New mom emotions to look out for and how to deal with them

• You’re feeling lonely

Talking to other new parents can be reassuring and help relieve any new mom loneliness and isolation. You could join some local mom and baby groups on social media, too. And don’t forget your old friends—they’re still there for you. Rather than staying indoors all the time (it’s OK to feel bored, too, by the way), meet a friend for a coffee or a walk around the park. If you’re a lonely parent, looking for things to do with baby that give something back to you, read our checklist here.

• You’re feeling stressed

If you’re struggling to keep on top of housework, or haven’t walked the dog for days, don’t be shy, and ask friends and family for some practical help around the house. They’ll be pleased they can help with your new mom stress and you’ll be able to tick off that to-do list.

• You’re feeling overwhelmed

Give yourself time if you’re feeling overwhelmed as a mom. You’ve just become a first-time parent, and that’s a huge change in your life. The constant needs of a newborn baby are a massive shock, so you’ll need a period of adjustment for this big change. Be kind to yourself.

• You’re feeling exhausted

Yes, it’s all very well saying sleep when your newborn baby sleeps. But there are other things you can do to help your energy levels and your new mother exhaustion. Don’t forget to eat—keep it simple and nutritious

• You’re feeling guilty

It’s entirely normal to not feel happy 24/7 as a new mom. You’ll feel a huge range of emotions, including negative ones like mom guilt. Accept these feelings—embrace them and talk about them. And never compare your parenting skills to other new moms. You’ll end up feeling guilty that you’re falling short. You’re not! Trust yourself and your intuition—you know what’s best for your baby. For tips on how to get rid of mom guilt, read our checklist.

• You’re feeling lost

You’re a woman, friend, partner—but now you need to add mom to the top of that list. New mom identity crisis is very common, but remember that you’re not selfish if you sometimes need to put your self-care needs above your baby’s. Take some time to yourself to clear your head. Grab some exercise, grab a bath, go see some friends for a chat. You’ll feel refreshed and stronger.

• You’re feeling sad

During the first week after childbirth, many women get what’s often called the “baby blues”. You may feel tearful and emotional, anxious, or irritable. This is due to the hormonal and chemical changes that take place in your body after childbirth (and lack of sleep certainly doesn’t help either). All these sad mom symptoms are normal and as your hormones settle down should ease. Don’t suffer in silence. Talk to your partner, friends, and family. And if you’re worried, speak to your healthcare provider.

• You’re feeling confused

Friends, family—even strangers in the street—will try to give you unwanted baby advice. Yes, everyone has an opinion and they’re desperate to let you know it. No wonder you’re confused and feeling insecure in your own decisions. Their advice is well intentioned, so listen but feel free to ignore them! It’s best to trust the baby experts, so follow up with your HCP if you’re unsure about anything.

• You’re feeling like a failure

Let’s face it, nobody can prepare for the reality of becoming a parent. But that doesn’t stop us making plans while pregnant and imagining this perfect family life. Now that your well-laid plans are out the window, you may feel out of control, cheated even, and like you’re failing as a mother. Parenting is hard and you can’t plan for it, so try to go with the flow.

• You’re feeling happy

And so you should! It’s true: that unconditional love you feel for your newborn baby is amazing. Embrace being a happy new mom. Becoming a parent is a wonderful thing so enjoy every crazy, tough, exhausting moment of it!

Sources:

https://www.nhs.uk/conditions/pregnancy-and-baby/feeling-depressed-after-birth/ (Accessed July 2020)